18 glorious reasons to be a teacher...

ok so you want to be a teacher. That's ok, but you had better be ready for the question. The question is, "Are you crazy?" Of course the most precise, eloquent, and expeditious answer to the Question is ,"YES," but, in case you feel some masochistic need to elaborate on your compulsion, here are 18 perfectly logical reasons to become a teacher that any psychiatrist can understand.

You should become a teacher if:

1. You want to get home before the rush hour starts, even if you have to drive a 1968 Dodge Dart to do it.

2. You want your summers free so you can scrape together a living by driving a cab, tending bar, and selling fuller brushes.

3. You are a natural actor, unfazed by an audience that eats fritos, applies nail polish, and cracks Double Bubble during your performance.

4. You want to keep learning, especially about the chief exports of Liberia.

5. You are never wrong and are always the first to admit it.

6. You want to prove to your mother that even if you cant pass geometry, at least you can teach it.

7. You want to impress your friends-particularly those under the age 11.

8. You enjoy tinkering with overhead projectors in your spare time.

9. Your favortie movie is DNA and You.

10. You want to be able to write any trip farther away than the Laundromat off your income taxes.

11. You love moron jokes

12. You have neat handwriting.

13. You particulary love moron jokes.

14. You want to be called Mr. or Ms. even if your starting pay is only $20,000 a year.

15. Your idea of a good summer beach read is Bragdon and McKutchin's History of a Free People.

16. You love kids. Or perhaps more precisely-you hate adults.

17. You are a whiz at making stuff out of Popsicle sticks and egg cartons.

18. You really love moron jokes.