When is it ok to not be ok?

So, I've basically had the worst weekend in my entire life. I think both my parents were fed lead based paint chips as children because they went off the deep-end this weekend. Which is fine. Many of you may think that I'm a horrible person. I have no problem writing people out of my life. To me, it's like a fresh start. A clean slate if you may. I seem to have turned the corner and gone back to my cynical ways. i blame my parents. and honestly i'm really ok with that.

Does anyone out there think that it's possible to change someone who doesnt want to change? Who doesnt think that he or she has a problem. I've come to the realization that you can't teach an old dog new tricks. i wish there was a way to force someone to get help. (and im sure drugging someone and dragging them in isnt an option.)

ok new topic...guilt trips. they dont work on me. dont try. im totally unsympathetic to anyones minute problems. Don't tell me you love me and that you would bend over backwards for me...and expect to find my soft spot. I'm heartless and honestly i probably dont trust you in the first place. i have issues and im willing to admit to it. but heres the catch, what if you realize where your problems stem from and those persons arent willing to accept that fact? what now? its a downward spiral into a shallow grave.

im down and out and basically confused these days. i apparently have serious trust issues now. ive been burned more than once. one time is too many. which is why writing a person out of my life takes no effort. one minute youre in and one minute youre out. its that easy. unless of course i bring you back in so i can steal your kidneys and reap the benefits from selling them on the blackmarket.

i know there is something wrong with me now....my body physically hurts. i have no motivation whatsoever. i have been forced into a state of depression maybe? i dont know. all i know is that i stopped caring a long time ago.